Thursday, July 22, 2010

top Chef DC! 6

I like the quickfire concept of this episode in part but not the elimination challenge. First the concept was boring -- Cold War, really? How -- 80s.

The quickfire is a familiar one. How often have top chefs in the past had to use offal and exotic stuff? The twist was egregious, even ridiculous.

Andrea revealed herself to be pretty self-involved and egotistical. Yeah, girlfriend, you're up there with Michelle Bernstein. Sure, go ahead and blame your kids for falling behind her.

Alex doesn't know how to cook ostrich. I've had ostrich in enough restaurants to think that's pretty pathetic. It doesn't taste like chicken -- it tastes like steak. You serve it rare -- like steak. So of course it was dry. And Alex, you are now most definitely on my villain list with Angelo with your sneaky subterfuge with Amanda. I don't care for Amanda either, but please be professional.

So could I eat llama? I don't know. Does it taste like cow? They're very cute. But so are cows. I definitely couldn't eat white duck kidneys. eeewwwww. Just like Rocky Mountain oysters.

Brief pause for Washington, DC excitement. Dupont Circle! in a quick glimpse. Their tour on the Sequoia makes me curious. Is that tour available to regular people?  I wasn't recognizing the coast at all -- where were they?

So the elimination challenge is really boring. The magical elves don't explain the vocabulary and don't explain the techniques. There wasn't a whole lot of time spent on cooking because of the way the judging was structured.

And I'm not sure if I like the chefs judging each other. It's a page from a different kind of reality show. Perhaps Kenny did deserve to be on the bottom, since the judges didn't bring anyone else into the room, but you can't help but be suspicious. But cartilege sounds like an egregious sin to me, Amanda.

Tom Colicchio has the best facial expressions. When they started trashing Kevin's dish, his face was priceless, as if he was saying "you guys are just too much." You aren't impressing the head judge with your pickiness, buckos.

Commercial break. Oh dear lord, I'm dreading this DC housewives series. Bleh, yuck, poohey. I'm already sick of the Saledis as it is. Isn't their 15 minutes of fame over already?

So the second group seemed fairer and not as harsh in its judgments. As much as I hate Kenny's macho posturing, at least he's not a slimy Iago-type like Angelo, going around whispering poison in others' ears.

Tamesha's dish must have been nasty, judging from the expression on Gayle's face. She was pretty quiet at judge's table and at the dining table, too. Wonder if she's holding in the words for her new show on dessert making. I'm not that much of a dessert eater, so not certain if I'll get into it.

Then again Michelle Bernstein didn't really like Kenny's dish either, so would the judges have chosen someone else to add if the bottom wasn't really so surprising. In fact, Tom in his blog said Kenny deserved to be there.

But wh00sh that he stayed. This season seems lacking in talent, so they need to hold on to every consistent winner they can. But I kinda wonder if Angelo is somehow psyching out Kenny.

I'm sorry to see Tamesha go since she was the hometown girl and the Post and other outlets have been giving the new version of the Oval Room a thumbs-up. She sold me with irritation with Amanda. And she seemed talented -- ended up in the top on this week's Quickfire. At least she won't have Angelo whispering in her ear anymore.

PS I really did not need to know about Ed and Angelo's girlfriend. Really. Honestly. That's something for Sleezy Island, not Top Chef.

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Top Chef DC! 5

So I'm still a bit bummed about last week. Chefs who should have been at the bottom were getting getting immunity and one of the more entertaining chefs was eliminated.

Finally, they get a challenge that really has something to do with DC. I have to admit I find blue crabs a real pain in the tush to eat. It's a lot of work for not much crab. Much better to go over to Miz Charlotte's of the green house, bullet-proof glass and all. Nothing beats buying a lump crabmeat sandwich and awesome collard greens and taking over to Kennilworth Aquatic Gardens (especially when the lotus blossoms are blooming).

I'm getting a wee bit tired of Kenny's alpha male talk. Methinks he protests too much. Geez, give it a break. You might make start rooting for Angelo.

Speaking of which, what's up with his obsession with Tamesha. He even gave her some help during the quickfire, which is very un-Angelo-like. And what's up with the flirtation when he has a baby. Hello?

My guess is either Kevin or Tamesha are going home. OK, Tamesha is getting the loser edit with the family talk. Bad sign.

I really hate Timothy's mustache. It really irritates me.

Well, actually, the group seems to be working together, giving each other advice and tasting each other's food. That's a refreshing break from the back-biting and sniping we've seen so far. Despite his chest-thumping, sounds like Kenny does have leadership skilz.

Well, thank goodness they didn't do the usual loser edit. Even with the alpha male crappola, Kenny probably still deserved the win. I'm glad to see that it wasn't the Kenny and Angelo show.

The usual three on the bottom. They could cut all three and not lose anything.

Huh? I didn't quite understand Patrick's critique of Stephen's salad.

Tom just sounded like a teacher giving a lecture to Amanda.

I could listen to Eric Ripert all day. I could sit on a beach sipping a fine Sauvignon Blanc and listen to him reading a telephone book. (slaps own face, must snap out of it)

I just realized why Amanda grates. She sounds like every entitled, trust-fund female intern from Ivy League, privileged schools working in Washington, DC. They all have that same nasal-ly voice as they walk down the street talking on cell phones. How do you end up with that voice?

Not going to miss the Player. Buh-bye!

Edited to add: Patrick is Patrick O'Connell, chef and owner of the Inn at Little Washington. It's supposed to be the place you go to for special anniversary dinners and other special occasions. Of course, you're probably going to drop $150 to $200 per person, the reason we're not going there anytime soon -- unless we win the lottery. And since we don't play the lottery....

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Work of Art

Geez, the bimbo with the fake boobs who doesn't know Jane Austen from a paper bag is still there. This show is pretentious claptrap.

Top Chef DC! 4

So I'm feeling jeeeaaaalousss of my sister, M, who got to try Richard Blais' new restaurant, Flip. I want stories!

Meanwhile, Tracey gets the best loser award last week. Her farewell was gracious and professional and not at all whiny. Not much else can be said about that episode, except maybe that it didn't do justice to Mount Vernon, which is one of my most favorite places in the whole wide world. If only Maryland doesn't develop the other side of the Potomac, it will remain perfect.

Otherwise, I'm getting bored of all the DC cliches. Bring on the soul food, the Ethiopian community, the farmers' markets, the crabcakes.  

This bunch of chefs is not winning me over. There are way too many sour, dour Lisas in this group and not enough nerdy Blaises or intense Voltaggios.

Baby food, really? Babies don't have much taste. Or at least they can't express their pleasure or displeasure too much. Much like cats.

How is it Padma always gets some thing that is wrong, a stray lemon seed? At least they had to cook grownup food too. Though I imagine any baby would spit out these chefs' food. Doesn't seem baby foodesque to me.

So Tamesha wins! good for the hometown girl who has gotten zero, Z-E-R-O attention thus far. Tim, who actually works in Baltimore, not DC, is a poseur. And I root for Kenny to win over Angelo any day even though he's a bit dour. The back story was sad, though.

I think Lynne might be getting the loser edit. Looked like Amanda was running through Whole Foods with yet another bottle of booze. She does like her alcohol. Even for kids.

A sexual harassment interlude. Lovely. Doesn't Angelo have a new baby?

Hmmm. Foreshadowing last week. Ed was badmouthing Alex. Now the reverse. 

Tiffany carries Tim with her! She's actually someone I'm rather rooting for because she worked her way up from IHOP. Classic American bootstraps story. Too bad her partner was the Poseur.

And rats on Amanda. 

What the frack is gnudi? Sometimes I wish Top Chef would define this stuff.

I don't want Kenny or Kelly to go home, so I guess I have to root for Lynn and Arnold as the losers. sigh. Don't know that sending a team home is fair because there's a lot of strong chefs on the bottom. It would be so wrong if either Kenny or Kelly went home. 

Spike is such a pretentious donkey.

Wow, they made the other chefs hang out and wait for the results. OK, Kelly is safe. If they send Kenny home, will be very bummed.

I love Tom's facial expressions. Arnold's blathering was not selling him. The judges' comments edits are hinting at a Kenny Kevin departure but Lynn got the loser edit, so I can only hope.

Shoo. Kenny is saved. But sorry to see the bottom. That was rough. 

Edited to add: This heat gives me middle of the night insomnia. Even with the fans going, our bedroom gets really hot. So I got to watch TC again.

Lynne is a jerk. She acted as if Arnold lost the contest but it was her fussing about overcooking the pasta that led it to be underdone. Then she points out the pasta is underdone as if it wasn't her fault. Good riddance to her.

Also, they didn't make a big deal of Nora, the guest judge. I didn't even catch her name. I've been to both her restaurants, though prefer Nora Asia. Her restaurant was the first to be certified organic in DC. She's this area's Alice Waters. I didn't know she was German or Austrian, or whatever that accent is.

And finally, Alex is a wanker. How many sex jokes did he cram into his three minutes of on-camera interviews. Methinks he protests too much.